We are hitting the mid-point of the college football season and the only thing that is certain is that in a few months time people and the media will be bitching about some team getting slighted by the oh-so-adored BCS. Last year that team was Texas.
Like the Florida Gators would eventually do in the National Championship game, the Fightin' Bevos beat the Oklahoma Sooners by 10 points on a neutral field. Unlike Florida, who got a crystal football and some gaudy rings for their win, Texas went on to be surpassed in the BCS standings (and thus an invitation to the Big XII title game) by a team they had beaten. Yes, Texas lost control of their own destiny with a last second loss to Texas Tech, but come on, anybody with a shred of common sense gives Texas the nod for the title game last year. Tomorrow, no matter what ole' Mack Brown says, Texas will finally get a chance to take out a little bit of that built up bitterness. Time to pick em'.
#3 Texas vs. #20 Oklahoma (Noon ET)
JNG: Yes, Texas has struggled at times this season as evidenced by a porous Colorado team hanging around for nearly three quarters. Yes, 2008 Heisman Trophy winner Sam Bradford is back and seemingly in form after passing for over 300 yards last week. Yes, at 3-2 (never mind those losses came by a combined 2 points and without Bradford) a win against their heated rival would make the Sooners season and all but end Texas title dreams. All signs point to Bob Stoops boys leaving the Texas State Fair with a season redeemed.
I don't see it. I see something on the lines of Vince Young's 2006 Longhorns steamrolling a reeling Sooner team. I attribute Texas close games to a lack of feeling threatened or challenged. When this team has had to turn it on, it has turned it on. Their defense is going to manhandle OU's offensive line like Joey Chestnut manhandles hot dogs. Trust me, Sam Bradfords going to be feeling the heat.
But honestly though, how can I pick against man crushes Colt McCoy and Jordan Shipley. Besides having the most badass name in the history of Texas football, McCoy is a gamer. I expect him to be at the top of his game tomorrow. And Shipley would be on many people's Heisman list if the season were to end today. These two buddies won't lose their final game to the Sooners.
And how could I not root for the same team Colt McCoy's smoking hot girlfriend (Baylor track star Rachel Glandorf) root for? I couldn't. Texas 41, Oklahoma 23.
MLC: I must agree. Rachel Glandorf is hot. Like nuclear. It doesn't even bother me that her last name makes her sound like a character out of the Lord of the Rings trilogy (Glandorf the White Wizard?)
The bad news for the 'Horns is that Colt McCoy's smoking hot girlfriend is about the only thing about this team that is as good as last year. This is a Texas team that struggled against Wyoming for a half. This is a Texas team that had trouble with Colorado for three quarters. This is a Texas team with banged up running backs.
Now, this is an Oklahoma team that will be missing its best player. Yes, I know that the Sooners' pube-haired quarterback Sam Bradford will be playing quarterback while doing his best to look like a Japanimation, Dragon Ball Z character. But I'm talking about Jermain Gresham, the monster tight end that should be dominating the nation this year. Gresham hurt his knee in the preseason and reaggravated it while kicking himself for not going pro (ok, that may not have happened).
OU also has holes in it's O-Line. Do you think there was a Coach Kilmer-Billy Bob moment after the BYU game? I feel like Bob Stoops went all West Texas on the offensive line: "You got one job and that's to protect (Lance Harbor) Sam Bradford! And you can't even do that. Get out of my sight (Billy Bob) o-line. Get out of my sight!"
On another note, how disappointing does this Heisman race have to be for us to get a do-over? Remember the beginning of the year? "This could be the only season in college football history where three Heisman Trophy winners have played at one time!" Um, no. Football Jesus got hurt. So did Dragon Ball Sam. Colt McCoy is banging his hot girlfriend (and really, who wouldn't?). And we're left with Jimmy Clausen. Jimmy...Clausen. More on him later.
To get back to the Red River Shootout, last year was two great teams. It was a great game, but a 10 point win for Texas. This year Vegas has set the line at 3. This means that they don't think Texas is as good as last year. And I agree. But neither is Oklahoma. I like Oklahoma by a touchdown because I don't think Texas will run the ball and I think Colt McCoy will be running for his life all game.
OU 28- UT 24
#4 Virginia Tech at #19 Georgia Tech (6 P.M.)
JNG: To me, autumn in Virginia is just as well defined by Va. Tech fans delusional bragging about their over-ranked team as it is about pumpkin pie and changing leaves.
It's clockwork. Somehow every October-November, every one I can remember, Tech gets up into the top 10 or top 5 in the national rankings. And every year they are exposed for they fraud they usually are. Oh, you beat Duke by 8 points? Oh, you got some lucky last-minute plays to beat Nebraska by 1 at vaunted Lane Stadium? Ok, yeah, you "destroyed" Miami in a nor'easter (that game reminded me of all those obligatory "let down" games you see in football movies where the team was either a strip club the night before or the star QB found out his girlfriend was pregnant). As much as I think Ryan Williams will be a stud in the ACC for the next couple of years, I am not going to jump on the Tyrod Taylor bandwagon just because he has had a few games where he could complete a pass.
I don't buy the Hokies. I never will. Look for Josh Nesbitt and the triple-option to rule the day. Ga. Tech 28, Va. Tech 21.
MLC: Tyrod Taylor gets exposed this game. It has to happen at some point, right? Please? Taylor beat Miami in a monsoon and 95 yards passing, 60 of which were on one play. He did make a hell of a play against Nebraska, but that's all you saw from that game, not the Tarvaris Jackson-style grounders he was tossing his receivers that kept Nebraska in the game. He is a TERRIBLE quarterback. Top 5 teams should not have this problem. One of these games, he's going to get exposed, and I pick it to happen here.
As far as Georgia Tech goes, they big, strong, athletic, fast, and completely one dimensional. Josh Nesbitt really looks awful throwing the ball, but he's still better than Tidewater Taylor. VT is undersized on the d-line, it's tough to play Tech in Atlanta (especially when they roll out that stupid fucking car after a touchdown. If you've been there you know what I mean). I think the triple option rules the day here.
For what Newman wrote about VTech people in Virginia. It's all true.
GT: 17 VT: 6
#6 USC at #25 Notre Dame (3:30 ET)
JNG: I don't get the whole "this is Charlie Weiss's judgement day" news story. Call me crazy, but I don't care if Weiss has the biggest male FUPA this side of Ralph Friedgen, the Fighting Irish are 4-1 and on their way to a respectable, possibly BCS, bowl.
It's not just that, but who exactly is going to do a better job in South Bend? This isn't the days of "Rudy", there are more schools out there with just as much money, just as much passion, and enough tradition to lure the nation's top talent away from the Irish. Yet, Weiss has gotten some future NFLers to play under the gaze of Touchdown Jesus. Jimmy Clausen leads the nation in passing efficiency, Golden Tate will be playing on Sundays and freshman linebacker Manti Te'o is a stud.
I don't think this should be Charlie Weiss last stand per say, but I don't think it matters. I see his team getting some vindication by taking advantage of Pete Carroll's worst offensive team in years and utilizing their own offensive prowess. Notre Dame 24, USC 21.
MLC: If the Irish are thinking high grass will slow down USC and give them a better shot to beat the Trojans, they should just keeping growing that grass higher and higher. I'm thinking if they have it cut about waist high, it 'll cover they're backsides and maybe they can avoid this impending ass-wupping they're about to get. Maybe If they play in a cornfield, they won't get cornholed on Saturday.
Nope. They will still get killed. Notre Dame is essentially a Big 10 team. This is not a good thing (Big 10 fans, keep reading for more of me shitting on your conference!). They haven't done anything particularly impressive at any point this year. They needed late drives against the likes of Purdue and Washington to seal a victory. I am not impressed. I know USC actually lost to the Huskies but they're stil crap and the Trojans are still the Trojans. They do this every year. They lose to a Pac 10 bottom feeder and they beat the crap out of Notre Dame. It's like the change of the seasons, you can count on it.
Don't even get me started on Jimmy Clausen. If I hear him mentioned as a Heisman CANDIDATE one more time (let alone a favorite), I will lose faith in college football fans. He is the best thing going on a mediocre team with a huge fan base and a TV contract. Sound like he should get the Heisman? No.
And Charlie Weiss? All I'll say is it must be tough to coach when you know you could die of any number of health problems. Between Weiss, Mangino at Kansas and Friedgen at Maryland, we might have a coach die on the sideline in the next 5 years. They all make me nervous. Someone please help these men. Save the whales!
But USC will be manning the harpoons.
USC: 38 Notre Dame: 17
#22 South Carolina vs. #2 Alabama (7:45 P.M. ET)
JNG: I don't drink the SEC kool-aid.
Going to college in South Carolina, all I ever heard about was how amazing the SEC was; how deep and grueling it was. Blah blah blah. I got news for you, the SEC is a two team conference this year. There isn't anything special about a single other team including USC. Losing to a 3-3 Georgia team and scoring 7 points against ACC doormat NC State leads to one big can of ass-whoopin' in Tuscaloosa.
Alabama has been the most impressive, and maybe best, team in football so far this season. 'Bama 33, Carolina 10.
MLC: It's been a while for the visor in Columbia and he still hasn't made it happen. I guess it's a little different recruiting for South Carolina than it is for Florida. When the two abbreviations you use for your school are used by other, better programs, that's just lame. South Carolina goes by USC (which anyone outside of the state will tell you stands for the Trojans) and Carolina (which anyone outside of the state will tell you is the Tarheels). What does this have to do with football? Absolutely nothing. I just think that it encapsulates the lameness of the school, and maybe explains why Spurrier has yet to recruit the type of eye-bulging talent that he did at Florida. That's definitely the case here.
Enter an Alabama juggernaut that is every bit as good as last years Sugar Bowl embarrassments. Living in West Texas, I see the double talk of devout christiantity crossed with footbal idolotry. Yes Jesus is the Lord, but if he could throw an 80 yard bomb to Julio Jones, Tide fans would be even better Christians. There's no way to describe the fawning over the Bama program that happens every season from every Bama fan. Those kids rule that town. They rule that state. When John Parker Wilson was a redshirt, he reportedly asked a cop who had pulled him over on suspiscion of drunk driving, "Do you know who I am?" kid hadn't stepped on the field yet and he's already big timing the local police. But that's the way it is in Tide Town. Those kids are Gods there. Who's turning that down on a recruting trip?
Add all of that to the fact that Saban can outcoach Spurrier in his sleep and you know we've got a blowout coming.
Bama: 42 USC, I mean Carolina, I mean SOUTH Carolina...the Gamecocks: 14
Arkansas at #1 Florida (3:30 ET)
JNG: This seems eerily familiar to last years lone Gator loss when a .500 Ole' Miss team left the The Swamp with a victory. Coming off an emotional win in a built up game, Florida would seem to be vulnerable against Ryan Mallett and an impressive Razorback offense.
That is, until you look at the Razorbacks defense. Look for Urban Meyer to open up his offensive playbook and try to get his illegitimate son...I mean quarterback some Heisman worthy stats. Florida 41, Arkansas 21.
MLC: Follow me here. Arkansas beats an undefeated Auburn team that may or may not be good, and people pick them to beat a Florida team that is just coming off a total assertion of superirority over the former number four team in the country?
No.
Arkansas ran all over Auburn because they were much faster. I started watching that game at the gym and thought at first that it was an ESPN Classic game or something because it looked like Felix Jones was back for the Razorbacks. That said, what does Florida have plenty of? Speed.
It doesn't matter that the inappropriate relationship between Tebow and Urban Meyer is causing Tebow to walk with a limp and play like a stiff (he was NOT good against LSU). The Gators have a defense that ia dominant and a player in Brandon Spikes who right now deserves to be considered for the Heisman. He'd be the best defensive player in the country if Donkey Kong Suh (yes, I know his name is actually Ndamukang) was not such a one man wrecking crew. Florida wins this game because Auburn is a fluke, Arkansas gets too much credit for beating a fluke, and Tim Tebows ass- I mean his head- is stil sore but the Gators are better with an ailing Tebow than most teams are healthy.
Gay-tors: 55 Arkansas: 10
#11 Iowa at Wisconsin (Noon ET)
JNG: I won't pretend to watch Big Ten football. It's about as boring to me as listening to the dialogue on "The Hills" (not that I watch that either or anything).
Anyways, I dig the Badger mascot with his cute pin-striped sweater and scowling face. Wisconsin 17, Iowa 13.
MLC: Iowa is not good. They had to block two field goals to beat a directional FCS team from within their state (Northern Iowa) at home. They play well against Big 10 teams, but the Big 10 is bad too.
That said, I watched the Wisconsin-Ohio State game last week, and Wisky was in it the whole time. By Big 10 standards, OSU is good. So give me Wisconsin in this one against Iowa, because no one in the Big 10 is good enough to go undefeated.
And as far as Bucky the Badger goes, Memo to all colleges: just because you give your lame mascot a mean mug and a puffed up chest does not make it cool. Bucky looks like a skunk that had an accident with a candy cane.
The Big 10: where Bucky the Badger sucks and our marquee game of the day is played at noon eastern. They're a baby step above the MAC. Booo. Just booooooooo.
'Sconsin: 20 Iowa: 14
On that note, can we get one more look at Rachel Glandorf? Yes, yes we can.
OU also has holes in it's O-Line. Do you think there was a Coach Kilmer-Billy Bob moment after the BYU game? I feel like Bob Stoops went all West Texas on the offensive line: "You got one job and that's to protect (Lance Harbor) Sam Bradford! And you can't even do that. Get out of my sight (Billy Bob) o-line. Get out of my sight!"
On another note, how disappointing does this Heisman race have to be for us to get a do-over? Remember the beginning of the year? "This could be the only season in college football history where three Heisman Trophy winners have played at one time!" Um, no. Football Jesus got hurt. So did Dragon Ball Sam. Colt McCoy is banging his hot girlfriend (and really, who wouldn't?). And we're left with Jimmy Clausen. Jimmy...Clausen. More on him later.
To get back to the Red River Shootout, last year was two great teams. It was a great game, but a 10 point win for Texas. This year Vegas has set the line at 3. This means that they don't think Texas is as good as last year. And I agree. But neither is Oklahoma. I like Oklahoma by a touchdown because I don't think Texas will run the ball and I think Colt McCoy will be running for his life all game.
OU 28- UT 24
#4 Virginia Tech at #19 Georgia Tech (6 P.M.)
It's clockwork. Somehow every October-November, every one I can remember, Tech gets up into the top 10 or top 5 in the national rankings. And every year they are exposed for they fraud they usually are. Oh, you beat Duke by 8 points? Oh, you got some lucky last-minute plays to beat Nebraska by 1 at vaunted Lane Stadium? Ok, yeah, you "destroyed" Miami in a nor'easter (that game reminded me of all those obligatory "let down" games you see in football movies where the team was either a strip club the night before or the star QB found out his girlfriend was pregnant). As much as I think Ryan Williams will be a stud in the ACC for the next couple of years, I am not going to jump on the Tyrod Taylor bandwagon just because he has had a few games where he could complete a pass.
I don't buy the Hokies. I never will. Look for Josh Nesbitt and the triple-option to rule the day. Ga. Tech 28, Va. Tech 21.
MLC: Tyrod Taylor gets exposed this game. It has to happen at some point, right? Please? Taylor beat Miami in a monsoon and 95 yards passing, 60 of which were on one play. He did make a hell of a play against Nebraska, but that's all you saw from that game, not the Tarvaris Jackson-style grounders he was tossing his receivers that kept Nebraska in the game. He is a TERRIBLE quarterback. Top 5 teams should not have this problem. One of these games, he's going to get exposed, and I pick it to happen here.
As far as Georgia Tech goes, they big, strong, athletic, fast, and completely one dimensional. Josh Nesbitt really looks awful throwing the ball, but he's still better than Tidewater Taylor. VT is undersized on the d-line, it's tough to play Tech in Atlanta (especially when they roll out that stupid fucking car after a touchdown. If you've been there you know what I mean). I think the triple option rules the day here.
For what Newman wrote about VTech people in Virginia. It's all true.
GT: 17 VT: 6
#6 USC at #25 Notre Dame (3:30 ET)
JNG: I don't get the whole "this is Charlie Weiss's judgement day" news story. Call me crazy, but I don't care if Weiss has the biggest male FUPA this side of Ralph Friedgen, the Fighting Irish are 4-1 and on their way to a respectable, possibly BCS, bowl.
It's not just that, but who exactly is going to do a better job in South Bend? This isn't the days of "Rudy", there are more schools out there with just as much money, just as much passion, and enough tradition to lure the nation's top talent away from the Irish. Yet, Weiss has gotten some future NFLers to play under the gaze of Touchdown Jesus. Jimmy Clausen leads the nation in passing efficiency, Golden Tate will be playing on Sundays and freshman linebacker Manti Te'o is a stud.
I don't think this should be Charlie Weiss last stand per say, but I don't think it matters. I see his team getting some vindication by taking advantage of Pete Carroll's worst offensive team in years and utilizing their own offensive prowess. Notre Dame 24, USC 21.
MLC: If the Irish are thinking high grass will slow down USC and give them a better shot to beat the Trojans, they should just keeping growing that grass higher and higher. I'm thinking if they have it cut about waist high, it 'll cover they're backsides and maybe they can avoid this impending ass-wupping they're about to get. Maybe If they play in a cornfield, they won't get cornholed on Saturday.
Nope. They will still get killed. Notre Dame is essentially a Big 10 team. This is not a good thing (Big 10 fans, keep reading for more of me shitting on your conference!). They haven't done anything particularly impressive at any point this year. They needed late drives against the likes of Purdue and Washington to seal a victory. I am not impressed. I know USC actually lost to the Huskies but they're stil crap and the Trojans are still the Trojans. They do this every year. They lose to a Pac 10 bottom feeder and they beat the crap out of Notre Dame. It's like the change of the seasons, you can count on it.
Don't even get me started on Jimmy Clausen. If I hear him mentioned as a Heisman CANDIDATE one more time (let alone a favorite), I will lose faith in college football fans. He is the best thing going on a mediocre team with a huge fan base and a TV contract. Sound like he should get the Heisman? No.
And Charlie Weiss? All I'll say is it must be tough to coach when you know you could die of any number of health problems. Between Weiss, Mangino at Kansas and Friedgen at Maryland, we might have a coach die on the sideline in the next 5 years. They all make me nervous. Someone please help these men. Save the whales!
But USC will be manning the harpoons.
USC: 38 Notre Dame: 17
#22 South Carolina vs. #2 Alabama (7:45 P.M. ET)
JNG: I don't drink the SEC kool-aid.
Going to college in South Carolina, all I ever heard about was how amazing the SEC was; how deep and grueling it was. Blah blah blah. I got news for you, the SEC is a two team conference this year. There isn't anything special about a single other team including USC. Losing to a 3-3 Georgia team and scoring 7 points against ACC doormat NC State leads to one big can of ass-whoopin' in Tuscaloosa.
Alabama has been the most impressive, and maybe best, team in football so far this season. 'Bama 33, Carolina 10.
MLC: It's been a while for the visor in Columbia and he still hasn't made it happen. I guess it's a little different recruiting for South Carolina than it is for Florida. When the two abbreviations you use for your school are used by other, better programs, that's just lame. South Carolina goes by USC (which anyone outside of the state will tell you stands for the Trojans) and Carolina (which anyone outside of the state will tell you is the Tarheels). What does this have to do with football? Absolutely nothing. I just think that it encapsulates the lameness of the school, and maybe explains why Spurrier has yet to recruit the type of eye-bulging talent that he did at Florida. That's definitely the case here.
Enter an Alabama juggernaut that is every bit as good as last years Sugar Bowl embarrassments. Living in West Texas, I see the double talk of devout christiantity crossed with footbal idolotry. Yes Jesus is the Lord, but if he could throw an 80 yard bomb to Julio Jones, Tide fans would be even better Christians. There's no way to describe the fawning over the Bama program that happens every season from every Bama fan. Those kids rule that town. They rule that state. When John Parker Wilson was a redshirt, he reportedly asked a cop who had pulled him over on suspiscion of drunk driving, "Do you know who I am?" kid hadn't stepped on the field yet and he's already big timing the local police. But that's the way it is in Tide Town. Those kids are Gods there. Who's turning that down on a recruting trip?
Add all of that to the fact that Saban can outcoach Spurrier in his sleep and you know we've got a blowout coming.
Bama: 42 USC, I mean Carolina, I mean SOUTH Carolina...the Gamecocks: 14
Arkansas at #1 Florida (3:30 ET)
JNG: This seems eerily familiar to last years lone Gator loss when a .500 Ole' Miss team left the The Swamp with a victory. Coming off an emotional win in a built up game, Florida would seem to be vulnerable against Ryan Mallett and an impressive Razorback offense.
That is, until you look at the Razorbacks defense. Look for Urban Meyer to open up his offensive playbook and try to get his illegitimate son...I mean quarterback some Heisman worthy stats. Florida 41, Arkansas 21.
MLC: Follow me here. Arkansas beats an undefeated Auburn team that may or may not be good, and people pick them to beat a Florida team that is just coming off a total assertion of superirority over the former number four team in the country?
No.
Arkansas ran all over Auburn because they were much faster. I started watching that game at the gym and thought at first that it was an ESPN Classic game or something because it looked like Felix Jones was back for the Razorbacks. That said, what does Florida have plenty of? Speed.
It doesn't matter that the inappropriate relationship between Tebow and Urban Meyer is causing Tebow to walk with a limp and play like a stiff (he was NOT good against LSU). The Gators have a defense that ia dominant and a player in Brandon Spikes who right now deserves to be considered for the Heisman. He'd be the best defensive player in the country if Donkey Kong Suh (yes, I know his name is actually Ndamukang) was not such a one man wrecking crew. Florida wins this game because Auburn is a fluke, Arkansas gets too much credit for beating a fluke, and Tim Tebows ass- I mean his head- is stil sore but the Gators are better with an ailing Tebow than most teams are healthy.
Gay-tors: 55 Arkansas: 10
#11 Iowa at Wisconsin (Noon ET)
JNG: I won't pretend to watch Big Ten football. It's about as boring to me as listening to the dialogue on "The Hills" (not that I watch that either or anything).
Anyways, I dig the Badger mascot with his cute pin-striped sweater and scowling face. Wisconsin 17, Iowa 13.
MLC: Iowa is not good. They had to block two field goals to beat a directional FCS team from within their state (Northern Iowa) at home. They play well against Big 10 teams, but the Big 10 is bad too.
That said, I watched the Wisconsin-Ohio State game last week, and Wisky was in it the whole time. By Big 10 standards, OSU is good. So give me Wisconsin in this one against Iowa, because no one in the Big 10 is good enough to go undefeated.
And as far as Bucky the Badger goes, Memo to all colleges: just because you give your lame mascot a mean mug and a puffed up chest does not make it cool. Bucky looks like a skunk that had an accident with a candy cane.
The Big 10: where Bucky the Badger sucks and our marquee game of the day is played at noon eastern. They're a baby step above the MAC. Booo. Just booooooooo.
'Sconsin: 20 Iowa: 14
On that note, can we get one more look at Rachel Glandorf? Yes, yes we can.
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